Happy Halloween, Bearcat Fan! As the veil thins and fall sports prospects narrow, we at The Collegian have called on the sports journalism spirits to guide our troubled program to a dignified season’s end. Results are yet inconclusive, but I did awake last night to a mysterious message scratched deep into my bedroom door by an unseen force: “Use commas correctly.” Let’s go to the news!
The reds are rolling: men’s soccer knocked off No. 2 George Fox away (4-2), likely dashing the Bruins’ conference title hopes.
After firing off 12 shots-on-goal to GFU’s five, women’s soccer drew at zeroes. The ‘Cats need big results against the Whits at home this weekend to remain in top-half contention.
We’re on the board! Football ended their three game scoring drought by way of a 35-yard Dominic Corado (’25) pick-six at the death against George Fox. They ultimately lost 7-28, but may have gained confidence ahead of the morally crucial bout with UPS, which now lays directly ahead.
Swim’s back: they hosted SWOCC Friday night, but it’s Schrödinger's aquatics as scores have not yet been made available. More to come …
Volleyball picked up another loss at the hands of Fox but managed to snatch a set this go ‘round.
Men’s golf grabbed fifth at the Confluence Classic — they’ll be putting iron to green at the Tall Timbers Invite over the early week.
Basketball kicks off its season Nov. 1.
In the world of sport: Erik Ten Hag was dropped from Man. United gaffership, and after a year-long hiatus from the Ultimate Fighting Championship, Khamzat “Borz” Chimaev forced Robert Whittaker to panic tap early in round one after crushing his lower front teeth. Analysis of the fight includes sentiments such as “Ew” and “What the fuck was that?”
Eye on the conference: Lewis and Clark is retiring the “Pioneer” mascot; here’s hoping they have better taste than those rhetorical impressionists over at Whitman. “The Blues.” Get real. Whatever happened to scary animals and/or people? Save it for your gallery, Whitman.
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